Contact My Secretary Now!

10 Oct

Ok, my dear male
and female natured friends,

this kind of email business is not necessarily new; as we all do know. Nevertheless, I cannot help admitting the fact that I have never ever received such an email in such an enormously charming and God trusting touch! And here it comes:

Dear friend,

Compensating your past effort

You might find it difficult to remember me, though it is indeed a very long time ago. I am much delighted to contact you again after couple of years now, if you can remember vividly. It takes faith and God fearing to remember old friends and at the same time, to show gratification to them, despite all odds that made things not to work out as we projected with you then.

I am taking this liberty to inform you that the transaction we were pursing together years back was finally realized by God’s infinite mercy and I decided to contact you today as to let you know about this. I have conscience as a God’s fearing person to remember your tremendous effort and contribution to make things work out then. Presently, I am in Panama for some business negotiation and establishment with my partner who was unfortunately assassinated when realizing the fund out with me. I arrived in Panama yesterday and decided not to bury him but to go downtown to the hotel’s business centre in order to send you this very important email at its utmost efficiency.

As to compensate your past effort and contributions made in the past towards the past realization of the deal with me, I have signed a Cashier’s check sum of (US$1.600.000.00) as your compensation share from the deal. Before my travelling out to Panama, I left the check to my secretary as to send it to you upon your reconfirmation of your address where he will send it to you.

Please, contact my secretary in the name of Mr. Jodelle Keitel at Feel free to confirm to me through this email once you retrieve the check amount as I designated to you.

Thanking you for your past effort while hoping that you will use the compensation amount judiciously.

Friendly Yours,
malikos John

It is totally clear that I cannot take money even it is to be seen as a declaration of good – not to say – God’s trusted will, if I was not the one who did this mysterious money transaction in the past. Second, I am not that much God fearing as it might look to you on first impression. Third, there must be a second way of how to separate me, myself and I from my money. Maybe the following try might be the right one…maybe…

Dear Hamlet,

Do accept my sincere apologies if my mail does not meet your personal ethics. I introduce myself as Richards a former staff in the accounts management Section of a well-known bank here in UK.

One account in our bank with holding balance of £15,000,000 (Fifteen Million British Pounds) has been dormant and last operated in the past 5 years. From my investigations and confirmations, the owner of this account is a Foreigner by name Gerald Stone died on the 4th of January 2002 on fatal Motor accident.

Since then nobody has done anything as regards the claiming of this money as he has no family Member who is aware of the existence of neither the account nor the funds. Information from the National Immigration also states that he was single on entry into UK.

I have confidentially discussed this issue with some of the bank officials and we have agreed to find a reliable foreign partner to deal with. We thus propose to do business with you, standing in as the next of kind to the deceased and have the funds released to you after due processes have been followed.

This transaction is totally free of risk and troubles as the fund is Legitimate and does not originate from drug, money laundry, terrorism or any other Illegal act.

On your interest let me hear from you.


The only thing I really appreciate about this is this typical British kindness …